Another New BK Writer, Brian, Says, "Sup."

Well, the same as most of the writers on here I’m sure, I’m rather opinionated. Yet I’m a distinguished gentleman who certainly did not get into a fist fight in college after some moron was bad mouthing BACK TO THE FUTURE.  And opening day of KILL BILL, when the girl behind the counter said she wouldn’t watch the movie because ‘it looked like a cheap rip-off of CHARLIE’S ANGELS’, I didn’t feel nauseous and want to vomit out of contempt for her.   And during my 5 years of video store clerking, I never once had a customer throw a DVD at my head when a Full Screen vs. Widescreen debate got a little too heated.
 
Ok, so maybe some, or all of those things happened. But at least I never killed a man just to watch him die, though I imagine that would be quite the learning experience…  Anyhow, when it comes down to it, I know what I like and I don’t like when you don’t like it. I think everyone should read WALKING DEAD and watch FIREFLY or be ridiculed for not doing so. Does that make me an A-hole? Ok, yeah, it probably does. Oh well, I’m over it.

So here I am. A 26 year old with a Batman tattoo on one arm and a Detroit Lions logo on the other. That means I’m a dork who doesn’t read books without comic panels in them, and also I’m extremely loyal, even when my team blows.

I lived in the city of Detroit as a kid, which in my lifetime, has been one of the poorest, most down trodden, crime riddled cities in the country.  Granted, my folks moved us to the suburbs when I was still in elementary, but at heart I’ll always be a Detroiter. As a kid Detroit reminded me of Gotham City before Batman and Jim Gordon showed up. Corrupt Mayor, dirty cops, no one looking out common man. I dreamed of growing up and being Detroit’s Batman. As a result of that hero complex, I can’t tell you how many times in my youth I got beat up trying to defend other kids from bullies.

Somewhere along the line however, I lost that and became jaded and angry. I think it was when I was 14 and Warner Bros released BATMAN AND ROBIN. I’ve been in a bad mood ever since, thanks Schumacher.

As you may have noticed, I take my movies pretty serious. Once upon a time, I was even a Film Major. Though I think I learned more in my time behind the counter of CJ Video then I did in college. However, a couple things from class did stick with me.  First, most film majors are pretentious d-bags who can’t appreciate movies like CONAN THE BARBARIAN and SUPERMAN II. Bunch of fake turtlenecks who pretend they didn’t grow up watching HOWARD THE DUCK and now only like foreign films made pre-1978. Next, I realized, I’d much rather watch and review movies, than actually make them. Thus, for the time being, my college career halted.

In the subsequent years, I have ranted and raved about things that I deemed worthy of praise or ridicule, but did so without much of voice.  Now, Bam Kapow is giving me an outlet, a chance to let people know how highly I think of my own opinion.  Stuff like DIE HARD being the undisputed ‘Best Action Movie Ever’. Or that country music should be outlawed above the Mason Dixon, ect. ect. You know, common sense stuff.

The details? - I have a dog named Rambo whom I almost named Schwarzen-Bear. I like The Beatles, Frank Sinatra, The White Stripes, and WHAM! ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT should’ve never been canceled. At 6 foot 3, I look ridiculous in my little ’86 Escort.  I still have all my action figures from when I was younger, and I own a sweet-ass T-Shit collection. I have about 800 DVDs (most of them good) and around 1000 or so comic books (most of them Uncanny X-Men/Batman). Also I would be willing to defy nature to birth Kristen Bell’s babies if I could. Is that weird?

 
This is too long isn’t it? Anne M. keep her’s short and sweet. My bad.

Ah well, keep hope alive…that is in reference of course to the May 18th announcement on whether or not ‘Sarah Conner Chronicles’ will be back for  3rd season.