Asteroids: The... Movie?

By GuardianOfChaos on 07.02.2009

Hot on the bandwagon of video game movies comes a recent announcement that Universal has won the rights to produce a movie on Asteroids.  Ok let that sink in for a bit first.
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Ok, still conscious or has your brain jumped ship and swam for higher ground?  A movie is being made on a game with no character or plot.  This is the opposite of what normally occurs where a studio takes a game with great character and plot and removes them for the movie version.  What makes matters even more insane is that Universal won over three other studios that were bidding for the rights to make this movie.  The script will be penned by newcomer Matthew Lopez, who worked on recent Disney films Bedtime Stories and Race to Witch Mountain.  

I really can’t fathom what went into this decision.  I’m almost left speechless.  I understand that they do have the freedom to basically create a film from scratch simply using the name and well characters of a ship, an asteroid, and a flying saucer.  I see this movie as going three ways:

A crew of a mining ship must scour the asteroid belt for a recently discovered mineral that’s only available in said asteroids.  There they discover remnants of an alien civilization who soon return to claim their precious ore.  Since it’s a Disney film I’m imagining a game contest held like a sporting event between mankind and the aliens to determine who can blow up more asteroids.  Oh and the ships in the contest are piloted by kids.  And the aliens are green with antennae and really cute.

Another concept is maybe the aliens are hurling asteroids at the earth.  It’s up to a special fleet of spaceships armed with lasers to deflect the oncoming barrage, and then get back at the alien forces that started it.

Finally it could just be a simple disaster movie where they are trying to prevent asteroids that are on a collision course.  Though this would be more missile command in style, and that’s not accurate to the game.  

I guess my biggest concern is that it’s hard to foresee any action drama of shooting asteroids due to the fact that ASTEROIDS DON’T FIGHT BACK!

Sound off B!K!: Plot ideas?

7 Comments


 
2009-07-02 15:07:50
Zemitsu
I say combine Astroid with Missle Command, Galaga, and Centipede! Yeah, that'll give Michael Bay something to do. :P

 
2009-07-02 22:07:20
Jettwinlock
The movie starts with a lone individual sent of in a ship to fend off killer asteroids, that have been generically altered on steroids. These asteroids have a vengeance after one of their own were accidentally shot and broke into a pieces. Now this you hot shot ace fighter pilot must navigate through the asteroids to find out the truth of why these rogue asteroids have been altered and to what purpose is their plan on conquering Space it self. This lone space pirate must travel and

 
2009-07-02 22:07:45
Jettwinlock
side Centipedes to establish a new universal order. After exposing the Galaga leader to the Asteroids as the culprit who shot their first asteroid enraging them. They decided to live with the rest of the universe in piece as their protectors.

 
2009-07-02 22:07:56
Jettwinlock
meet with the Tetrians on Planet Tetris to gain wise wisdom about the people who altered these asteroids. On his adventures he meets up with a spunky side kick named Pong. A bad mo fo who bats pieces of rock for a living. With his new partner they must go to planet Galaxian to fight of the Galagians who with the help of the space invaders decided to try and alter asteroids as weapons of mass destruction . Only the find the Gaplus leader of all Galaga people has secretly been working along

 
2009-07-03 08:07:49
Skott Stotland
"generically altered" Given the rest of your post, and the news that inspired it, I honestly can't tell if this is the best typo ever or the most awesome wordplay since Shakespeare used the phrase "country matters."

 
2009-07-03 18:07:07
david660
You would think this is the bottom of the barrel of ideas but seriously expect to see Will Smith or Nick Cage in Pong: the movie anyday now.

 
2009-07-06 16:07:33
EL GUAPO
WTF?! Really....DAMN IT STOP RUINING MY CHILDHOOD!

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