Headlines
05.01.2009
Article by Henok Kidane

Zombies Are Real!!!

My fellow geeks and nerds, I knew this day would come – we knew this day would come. All the hours of practicing on first-person shooters, learning how to MacGuyver our way out of situations by constantly “mod”-ing any and all electronics we can get our hands on, the absorption of countless tips on surviving post-apocalyptic scenarios by watching thousands of horror films…it’s all led to this moment. Are you ready?

Swine flu is turning people into zombies. Yes – ZOMBIES.

Now, before you scoff and get back in line for the new Wolverine movie, just check out this quote from BBC - "Similar to a scare originally found in Cambodia back in 2005, victims of a new strain of the swine flu virus H1N1 have been reported in London. After death, this virus is able to restart the heart of its victim for up to two hours after the initial demise of the person where the individual behaves in extremely violent ways from what is believed to be a combination of brain damage and a chemical released into blood during ‘resurrection.’"

That’s a zombie! And not even a “Walking Dead” zombie, either; these are
crazy-ass hyper zombies, like the ones from “28 Days Later” or Garth Ennis’
Crossed (which you should really read if you haven’t yet, especially now). It’s not just in London and Mexico that the dead are rising from their graves, too; the article also describes a three-year-old boy in the Netherlands who died from swine flu, only to later arise and try to kill his mother.

The creepiest part of all this? It’s happening right at the same time that Green Lantern writer Geoff Johns is releasing his universal zombie war epic Blackest Night. I’ve heard of art imitating life, but this is ridiculous…and awesome.

Pig Meal

P.S. - You know who I feel kinda bad for? President Obama. In his first 100 days, not only has he had to deal with an imploding financial sector and all the issues that come with that, but now pirates and zombies? The only way this could get any more ridiculous for the guy is if an alien robot army came to take over the Earth.

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